Sorry guys,

Just had to call time out to brag on my Hawkeyes. We don't get to brag that often, so I have to take advantage. One can only wonder what could have transpired with a healthy QB for the last 3 regular games.

But we'll take it.

Carry on.

 

Hi Mired,

The best thing you can do is lock your self in a room and watch nothing but Top Gun for 7 days straight. When you come out, you'll be a shirtless volleyball playing, motorcycle riding, beautiful woman who will age horribly humping, poop hot fighter pilot with a killer callsign.

Your PA's will be a thing of manly awesomeness, and people will immediatly think: "that man with the deep crooning voice must have a hairier chest than Hasslehoff and have done more hot chicks than Tiger Woods."

However, if it doesn't work... just make your voice crack and insert random words like "bojangles" and "beef jerky" into your PAs. They may still suck, but people will turn to their neighbor and go "did that random jumble of words include the word "monkeyhumper?" And that right there makes it all worth it.

Don't forget your hat when you snuffleufogus go to the lav.

Thanks for calling. Keep it real, keep it doublebreasted.

-Clamp

 

Instead of doing all that, just say "meow" in every announcement. "welcome aboard, our flight time to xyz is meow 1:15."

only one passenger has every walked off and said "nice flight supertrooper"

 

Freaking brilliant! I now have a new game..




Mother of God.

 

I wouldn't say that. I had to go back to the -9 because I needed to get local for a while. My DC-10 flying was the best time I had at NWA. Followed closely by my 757 Asia flying. I didn't think about going back because at one point I got real close to the left seat of the 757.

Now, I have no idea of what I can do, or not do, hold or not hold, with an AE, VD, MD, or anything else for that matter. I have no idea what airplane is going where and where it will go. I'm as confused as that dog in the picture. Well, not that confused.

Leon, can I get a glass of courvosier to ease my mind?

 

Hey! Is that agent Smith??

 

Dear Clamp,
So what happens when you get to Europe and you're cornered by Cat Ranchers about going out to dinner. Your Captain says he will go with them, you feel obligated, you go. Dinner bill comes, you ate $15 U.S.D. worth of food but after all of the money is put in your table of seven comes up $60 short and the Captain already is paying double what he should and the Cat Ranchers seem oddly tongue tied at this moment.

What do you do then?

Thanks,
****ed in Milan

 

Do we own JAL yet? If so, can we get Alaska before AMR and what if they get them before us? Who's watching our six here with AMR and what would they go after or can we make a deal? Say, promise to help go after SWA with them?

 

Never mind.

 

Lets see, with the prospect of another 1,500 pilots senior to me doing flying we really should have been doing ourselves since the purchase of Western, let me be the first to wish American luck.

We'd have to (gasp) grow internally to compete.