Dear Dr. Clamp,

Last week I received my final blessing to fly as a 76A by the 7ER-CLCP. Since I'm transitioning from 75A, I still have to fly my first int'l. trip on a 76 with a LCP to become a real 7ERA. In preparation for this upcoming final hurdle, I have been immersing myself in all things ER. Unfortunatly, all I've been able to find are reruns of a TV show about doctors. Does this mean that I have to buy a V-tail Bonanza and join a country club?

Thanks in advance,

Mired in Motown

 

Dear Dr. Clamp,

Would you tell anyone senior to me to please buy a V-tail Bonanza.

Also, would you tell them if they want to be an ER A then they need to watch this short pro 7ER commercial from Delta and learn that while landing the plane hard is FUN and REAL, its not real fun for everyone else but in the reel world it looks cool: YouTube - 1994 Delta Airlines Advert and this one teaches any A on how to do an international flight attendant brief at Delta: Delta 1984 Commercial

Thanks,
FTB

 

Well hello, caller!

You are certainly going down the right track! I also congratulate you for buzzing LAN the other day and skurring the locals as such. I hope you had appropriate training in "avoiding buildings" and flying at "rediculously low altitudes."

Having grown up near a few 7ERA's...and one particularly bubbafied bubba that was in our neighborhood, I have a few suggestions:

1. Go to a photo studio and get professional pictures taken of yourself in uniform. Get a particularly large print of yourself framed and hang it at the top of the stairs. This way all your friends can bask in your ER grandeur.

2. Owning at least one airplane is always a good idea. In the event of furloughs, make sure you loudly proclaim how you are having to pick up greenslips to pay for the airplane in the crew room.

3. Country club is an absolute must. If it's in Peachtree City, that is an extra 5 ER bonus points. Drive golfcart everywhere.

4. Reinforce to all your friends that "Time flies, and so do I."


I think with these simple steps you can truly enjoy your seat even more. Don't forget to wear your hat when you go to the bathroom in the plane!


Thanks for calling caller. Call back and be a caller soon.

80ktsFLUF.

 

Nah...This one didn't even have Rodney Dangerfield in it. How can you call THAT a movie.

Carl

 

That's why we need to adopt the NWA "call in honest policy"

 

Carl, I wouldn't call it a movie either. My friends said it was great but my wife and I stopped it about half way to go back to watching, slow I hope your listening, fox news.

But I've got some really good pics of an unhappy groundskeeper in Japan waiting in the wings to use. I just need you to get grumpy about something to make them timely.

 

Thank you SO MUCH for all of the great ideas. If I have this straight, I should
1) eat more bacon
2) buy a motorcycle
3) ride said bike without a helmet
4) fly a V-tail Bonanza
5) "tell them I said OW"

"Got It"

 

Hey FTB, I found that clip that you told me that you made, a big thumbs up

YouTube - MD-88 Delta Airlines Tribute

shazzam!!

 

I'd also suggest buying that video from Sporty's.... "How an Airline Captain Should Look and Act."

Watch while eating Baconator after Baconator from Wendy's.

 

Always pure brilliance from my most trusted advisor!