Say sorry.

If in MEM, look up David C. (can't divulge last name but PM me when possible or ask around). He's the best, if still working.

I was listening to the best of 'Car Talk' the other day and during the credits they mentioned their staff divorce attorney was Carmine Knotters, I'd try to find him!

Uhhh..... sign a pre nup in advance? duh

In Texas there is no alimony, well at least there didn't used to be, not sure about now.

I never understood why women should get a monthly stipend once the marriage is over.

I mean, it's not like the man is getting anything for his money once she is gone. Why should he have to keep paying? Surely he has already paid enough for whatever she was willing to give.

Married for 20 years and no kids. Was she working? If not, why not? If she was not working, she got a 20 year "free ride". Why does she deserve more money? If she has been working, then she keeps her job and he keeps his. They can both live on what they make.

Child support I can understand. You made the kids, you should pay for their upkeep.

Sorry, I just reread the original post. She took the last 10 years off. Time for her to go back to work. It should not be your problem to support her once she is no longer around to make you a sandwich.

Money because she is too lazy to earn it herself makes no sense to me.

I consider this part of the war on men, and we are losing badly.

As women achieve salary parity in the workplace, it is obvious the draconian practices in family court also need to be revised.
Equal pay == Equal treatment in family court

You can interchange the “he and she” in the last post if the woman was the bread winner and the man stayed home and chopped fire wood for the last 10 years.

If kids were involved, I’m sure the woman would be favored more no matter the circumstances. Which, I agree, things need to change.

He is an associate at the law firm of Dewey, Cheatham and Howe. What a great show.

Back on topic, you are getting good advice from a lot of people here.

I reiterate, you will be much better off agreeing than litigating. Just the lawyer fees alone of arguing before a judge will be huge. Plus, again, going before a judge is a roll of the dice. You are going to have to pay; best to have some control yourself than to put it in the hands of a stranger.

LNL and navigatro's advice regarding a mediator is excellent. Look hard at that.

I have two Delta friends that got divorced, equal finances one mediated one fought it. They received basically exactly the same settlement. The one that mediated spent around $4000 for attorney the other spent over $30k. Do yourself a favor and get a mediated settlement, most states and most judges are pretty cut and dry how they split assets. Don't buy an attorney another car.

I have to agree with the bulk of this. The courts are set up to favor the women, and somewhat understandably kids when involved.