I’ve done both (14 years airline and 12 office) and from my experience, being home every nite is wonderful. Same time zone, own bed, better sleep quality, no bed bugs, healthier eating just to name a few. I have much better quality time with the family.

 

Time off? Large blocks of time off? Pay? No phone calls? No boss? No reports?

But being home every night is why turns go senior. At an airline, with some seniority, guys get to pick what days they work. And some stay on smaller a/c to have more seniority. To fly turns, or control the days they fly or have off, etc.

 

I've done both, kind of.... 7 years at a regional airline, and two as a pilot/office guy (alternating travel for a week then was 8-5 the other week). My wife was accustomed to the airline life and didn't like the office (less quality time, more dinner and go to bed, office politics, less travel, tied to the phone, etc).

We don't always like the time apart, but it also works for us. My wife is very strong and independent, but you will still have moments, "The furnace stopped working", "The kids or Mrs is/are sick and you're not home". We like the flexibility at the airline to get days off we really want without having to get approval from the office and use PTO.

 

It's all about perspective. My wife and I met when I was dead last on the seniority list at my former airline. That sucked. When I could hold a line it was better. When I held weekends and holidays off, it was even better.

Commuting wore on our relationship, and I decided to leave the airline. Got a home based job, and it took an adjustment because neither of us were used to spending that much time together. After the adjustment, it was great. I got a "promotion" that resulted in going from 3-4 days a week at work for 6-10 hours at a time, to working 70 hours a week, carrying a company phone, and getting calls at all hours of the night, and on vacations. That lasted about a year before I resigned from the position and returned to where I belong.

I don't think I could go back to it, but I think it's much easier today. We used to talk about how cell phones helped keep in touch with families and I'm sure facetime/skype take it a step further, especially with kids in the mix but at the end of the day, nothing beats your own bed.

 

Used to fly long-haul freight. Tough on the wife.She called herself a single mother raising our young daughter. Time off was great, but being away sometimes for six weeks was challenging.
A strong marriage will survive.
Now I fly short haul, home every night on a narrowbody and won't look back. Much easier all around.
The trick is to be faithful to your wife and family and it will work out.
Not really a trick of course, just be a decent human being.

 

"I don't avoid women, Mandrake, but I do deny them my essence."
Brig Gen J. Ripper

 

Nice quote!

 

Female Domestic Flier married to a Long Haul Pilot here,

The guy and girl pilot thing has worked for us for the past 10 years. Yes, Half the marriage is spent apart, but that hasn't been a problem; I like to say we each wear a pant leg. The problem our wedded fellow fliers seem to face is that the wife ( I don't know any female fliers married to grounded guys) thinks they understand what marrying a pilot means, but then when the turds hit the turbine and he's at a Hilton in Hong King, she melts down and "can't do it alone." You'll need to find a song self driven Woman who won't freak out when the pipes freeze, or their car breaks down or they just feel overwhelmed. There will be times when she alone has the Con, and she'll need to be OK with that.

Another thing that seems to nail fellas; marrying an insecure Women. My better half could be Slipping a Tokyo escort the ol' hard salami as we speak. Conversely I could be doing the horizontal hula with who knows who whilst he's away. We trust each other. I've never checked his phone, computer etc....never once and to the best of my knowledge, he's never done that to me. Flying allows for infidelity, I trust that my Wookies stays true. I will never really know if he does, cheating would be easy, but I trust him. I trust him completely and vice versa. This is huge. If you have any questions post 'em here and I can do my best to tell you how us two fellow fliers have fared.

RadialGal

 

RadialGal and others nailed it, trust and independence from both sides is huge. Been in the 121 biz now for over 12 years and still happily married the whole time. We are both fine with time apart and then enjoy our time together even more as a result. No reports/emails, phone calls, etc. keeping either of us distracted from the other when both of us are home (her job has very little outside of work responsibility).

So it most certainly can be done with the right partner, just gotta find the right one and learn to make the best of an odd career.

 

"I've been married for 12 years and I still love the same woman.
If she found out, my wife would kill me".