Whats the funniest thing you have ever heard over the radio??
05-15-2006, 01:53 PM
#91
Line Holder
Joined APC: Nov 2005
Posts: 56
Originally Posted by Iflywinnebagos
A friend who instructs told me of a student he once had. The student was on his second or third flight ever and the instructor told him to contact ground for clearance. He told the student, "Tell ground who you are, where you are, and what you want to do, and the atis information." The student pauses for a second to rehearse in his head and then keys the mic and says "ground control... this is Jake... I'm in prescott arizona and want to get my private pilots license... with the atis information." ATC comes on freq laughing and says "Jake who is your instructor?" Without hesitation the student keys the mic and in the background you can hear my friend yelling at his student to let go of the mic key.
True story, and if you didn't catch it, Prescott Arizona is home to the world's finest flight school, Embry-Riddle.
True story, and if you didn't catch it, Prescott Arizona is home to the world's finest flight school, Embry-Riddle.
In Daytona Beach, we had a Riddle kid (solo) take off from a taxi way when he misinterpreted the ATC instruction (loose paraphrase) "Riddle 123, runway 7L, Echo intersection, cleared for takeoff." After a few more inquiries and a few more replies the student was certain that ATC wanted him to take off on Echo taxiway. He did, and the rest is history....
05-16-2006, 05:57 AM
#92
Line Holder
Joined APC: Feb 2006
Position: J3 to CL600; retired doing instrument taining
Posts: 78
more ATC recollections to add
Number 1
On a crystal clear beautiful blue fall day in the 90’s, Kansas City Center queried a Aero Commander freighter as to being R-Nav equipped. The Commander pilot replied “negative but we are vector equipped”. Center then issued a heading and said when receiving xxx VOR proceed direct.
And another
This past spring, ground control at Washington Dulles had aircraft backed in a line 15 to 20 aircraft long for departure. When asked by a commuter pilot for the reason for the delay, the controller stated in a stern tone on ground frequency “We got into a P***ing contest with Potomac approach and approach won. Everybody expect indefinite delays”. After this transmission, there were no more questions asked.
On a crystal clear beautiful blue fall day in the 90’s, Kansas City Center queried a Aero Commander freighter as to being R-Nav equipped. The Commander pilot replied “negative but we are vector equipped”. Center then issued a heading and said when receiving xxx VOR proceed direct.
And another
This past spring, ground control at Washington Dulles had aircraft backed in a line 15 to 20 aircraft long for departure. When asked by a commuter pilot for the reason for the delay, the controller stated in a stern tone on ground frequency “We got into a P***ing contest with Potomac approach and approach won. Everybody expect indefinite delays”. After this transmission, there were no more questions asked.
Last edited by cub pilot; 05-16-2006 at 06:18 AM.
05-17-2006, 12:22 PM
#93
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Mar 2006
Position: A Big One
Posts: 283
Originally Posted by lzakplt
I heard this one second hand years ago. The controller had directed the crew to expedite their descent. After deciding that they weren't complying, he said something like, "I told you to expedite your descent". The reply was, "We are already comming down faster than a Bonanza full of Doctors here".
05-17-2006, 01:29 PM
#94
Line Holder
Joined APC: May 2006
Posts: 62
Student took off solo from RDU to their practice area. After an hour or so practicing stalls, steep turns, and the like, he picked up the most recent ATIS and headed back to RDU, unaware that his ID placard fell off sometime during his maneuvering.
Student: Approach, Cessna... <pause> Approach, Cessna... <pause> Approach... this is Mike... with Sierra for full stop.
Approach: Hi, Mike... this is Sam... straight in for 23L, altimeter 30.12... and once you're safely on the ground, why don't you plan on giving ol' Frank a call.
Student: Approach, Cessna... <pause> Approach, Cessna... <pause> Approach... this is Mike... with Sierra for full stop.
Approach: Hi, Mike... this is Sam... straight in for 23L, altimeter 30.12... and once you're safely on the ground, why don't you plan on giving ol' Frank a call.
05-17-2006, 01:54 PM
#95
Line Holder
Joined APC: May 2006
Posts: 62
SR-71 stories are always impressive, if nothing else. Following is a good one I heard from an Air Force crew chief who had worked on them, as told from the pilot's vantage point.
Most people think that no matter how fast you go, you always want to go faster; but that's only true to a point. More than once, I've looked out ahead of the sled and seen a speck way off in the distance that quickly transformed into a blurred image of a weather balloon zooming down our right side. Thankfully, we weren't flying a half degree more to our right. In any case, we do go fast.
I remember listening to radio traffic on LA Center's frequency when a light single innocently asked Center for his ground track. After a momentary pause, Center replied, "November 1234A, showing you at... an impressive 138 across the ground."
Well, guys being guys, it wasn't but a second before a twin called up and asked for his speed. "November 5678B, showing you at 195."
Not to be outdone, a Navy jet called up and asked for his. "Vixen 34, showing you at 394."
It was then that I heard the all-too-familiar click of the VHF trigger in the back seat. "Center, Aspen 20, ground track, please." There was a long pause before the reply, "Aspen,... one thousand, seven hundred thirty eight."
The moments following that transmission were the quietest I can ever remember on LA's frequency.
Most people think that no matter how fast you go, you always want to go faster; but that's only true to a point. More than once, I've looked out ahead of the sled and seen a speck way off in the distance that quickly transformed into a blurred image of a weather balloon zooming down our right side. Thankfully, we weren't flying a half degree more to our right. In any case, we do go fast.
I remember listening to radio traffic on LA Center's frequency when a light single innocently asked Center for his ground track. After a momentary pause, Center replied, "November 1234A, showing you at... an impressive 138 across the ground."
Well, guys being guys, it wasn't but a second before a twin called up and asked for his speed. "November 5678B, showing you at 195."
Not to be outdone, a Navy jet called up and asked for his. "Vixen 34, showing you at 394."
It was then that I heard the all-too-familiar click of the VHF trigger in the back seat. "Center, Aspen 20, ground track, please." There was a long pause before the reply, "Aspen,... one thousand, seven hundred thirty eight."
The moments following that transmission were the quietest I can ever remember on LA's frequency.
05-19-2006, 07:38 PM
#96
Banned
Joined APC: May 2006
Position: Right Seat, EMB-145/140/135
Posts: 84
Overheard in Charlotte on ramp's freq, Lufthansa's 767 at the gate is notoriously in the way all the time. All other traffic was being held because they were starting to push when they stopped because they were missing a passenger. They said they had looked every where to no avail.
Eventually someone came on the radio and said "Did you check the oven?"
Needless to say Lufthansa was furious and demanded to know who said that!
One of the most off color and horrible jokes I've ever heard but I died laughing for about 15 minutes. Silly Germans.
Eventually someone came on the radio and said "Did you check the oven?"
Needless to say Lufthansa was furious and demanded to know who said that!
One of the most off color and horrible jokes I've ever heard but I died laughing for about 15 minutes. Silly Germans.
05-19-2006, 07:45 PM
#97
Banned
Joined APC: May 2006
Position: Right Seat, EMB-145/140/135
Posts: 84
I was flying with one of our more "colorful" captains one day and was waiting to get cleared for the visual approach into PHL. The approach cont. (who was female) ask us: "PDTXXX call the field". The captain proceeded to get on the mike and shout "HERE, FIELD, FIELD, FIELD...COME HERE BOY"
THe controller got a kick out of it.
THe controller got a kick out of it.
05-22-2006, 12:48 PM
#98
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Apr 2006
Position: A220 First Officer
Posts: 569
Heard this one from my CFII flight instructor. He's coming into the field on an IFR flight plan talking to approach. He says he would like a contact approach. Approach replies "sioux 29 you are on with approach". Then the CFI replies "we would like a contact approach...it's like a visual approach" Approach replies "sioux 29 you are already on with approach, understand you would like the visual." CFI says "Negative, we'd like to cancel IFR."
06-04-2006, 09:30 AM
#100
Guest
Posts: n/a
"Cactus XXX cleared ILS RWY 11L confirm localizer intercept"
Cactus XXX ( womans voice) UUUUUHHHHMMMM I dont know, does it matter? we have the field in sight ,giggle.
Another time I was flying formation with my boss in 2 Caravans enroute from Libby to Sky Harbor when the weather began to deteriorate. He hollered for an IFR clearance and got it ,I wasnt so lucky( any of you who fly around there know that if there is a cloud within 20 miles of PHX that all hell breaks loose with the Phoenix Tracon and delays insue)so I was descending below terrain to maintain VFR while trying to get a clearance.I was at 4,500 ft and the MEA in that area was 8000. Center says they wont clear me unless I can get to 7000.Then my boss pipes in, thinking that he is on the discreet freq when he is really on center, and he says " Cassaundra, just climb to 7000 and get the clearance, screw those guys"
Complete silence.
Center comes back with "last reported say again"
Silence....
Cactus XXX ( womans voice) UUUUUHHHHMMMM I dont know, does it matter? we have the field in sight ,giggle.
Another time I was flying formation with my boss in 2 Caravans enroute from Libby to Sky Harbor when the weather began to deteriorate. He hollered for an IFR clearance and got it ,I wasnt so lucky( any of you who fly around there know that if there is a cloud within 20 miles of PHX that all hell breaks loose with the Phoenix Tracon and delays insue)so I was descending below terrain to maintain VFR while trying to get a clearance.I was at 4,500 ft and the MEA in that area was 8000. Center says they wont clear me unless I can get to 7000.Then my boss pipes in, thinking that he is on the discreet freq when he is really on center, and he says " Cassaundra, just climb to 7000 and get the clearance, screw those guys"
Complete silence.
Center comes back with "last reported say again"
Silence....
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
