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Tool of the day

Old 08-13-2012, 05:32 PM
  #2401  
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Originally Posted by FrankCobretti View Post
"I only discuss _____ with people I'm trying to nail. And you don't look like you put out."
I hate to say it, but you may need to have a response ready in case TOTD says "oh, but for you I would put out..."
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Old 08-13-2012, 05:37 PM
  #2402  
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What's the deal with pilots who wash their uniform shirts at water temperatures colder than 38 degrees Centigrade???

Only a tool wouldn't know that the optimum water temperature for cleaning an approved "aviation white" dress shirt is in the range of 46-57 degree Centigrade.
That explains two things: 1) Why my shirts look like a crack-ho's teefas, and 2) that you don't know that Centigrade was changed to Celsius a few years ago. but I still knew what you meant, so big whoop.

TW
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Old 08-13-2012, 05:39 PM
  #2403  
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Originally Posted by 80ktsClamp View Post
July 15:

Hi everyone.

Great news! I am now qualified as a Captain in the VRJ900 jet! It is a permanent “endorsement” on my pilot license that can never be taken away. Now, on to what has happened in the past 3 weeks.

Can never taken away? Umm, not really.
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Old 08-13-2012, 05:40 PM
  #2404  
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The CA who critiques my on the numbers, in the box landings then floats 2000 feet down the runway only to pound it on when it's his leg.
Conversely, the F/O who doesn't just think he knows everything because he was a fighter pilot, he Knows it!

T/W
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Old 08-13-2012, 05:44 PM
  #2405  
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Originally Posted by NERD View Post
And second, to the comair crew in a unnamed capital city that would not hold the van for 5 mins for a Delta crew. Jokes on you dumb****. Hope you enjoyed your 3am phone call.
If another crew checked in with tower right behind me, I know they're five minutes away.

But if the van driver says "the other crew will be here in five minutes", it means the same as "the van will be there in five minutes" which is likely half an hour.
"The van will be there in five
minutes". Translation: "ok, send out the van!"

T/W
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Old 08-13-2012, 05:47 PM
  #2406  
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Originally Posted by Boomer View Post
Ten minutes in the McDonalds ball crawl is a better workout than 30 minutes on the hotel treadmill.

Scientific fact.
Just brought back a memory....

Had an overnight that didn't have any food nearby. The van driver offered to take us through the drive thru on his way back to the airport to pick up a PSA crew. I decided to order extra food for the inbound crew since we would be packing Mickey D's with these guys in the van and I thought it lousy not to have enough to go around since they'd have to smell it and might be hungry.

Crew gets it, I hand two out of three individual bags with a burger / fries or whatever it was to very appreciative crewmembers who hadn't eaten in a while. Third guy curtly tells me "I don't eat that crap". Um..... OK dude......
"oh, sorry to offend your temple of a body". I'll ask the driver if he"ll pull over at the farmers market for some rabbit food for you".
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Old 08-13-2012, 05:49 PM
  #2407  
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What's the deal with pilots who wash their uniform shirts at water temperatures colder than 38 degrees Centigrade???

Only a tool wouldn't know that the optimum water temperature for cleaning an approved "aviation white" dress shirt is in the range of 46-57 degree Centigrade.
That explains two things: 1) Why my shirts look like a crack-ho's teefas, and 2) that you don't know that Centigrade was changed to Celsius a few years ago. but I still knew what you meant, so big whoop.

TW
That was a joke about my abundant age, not a reference to your physics & chemistry classes
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Old 08-13-2012, 05:53 PM
  #2408  
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The CA who critiques my on the numbers, in the box landings then floats 2000 feet down the runway only to pound it on when it's his leg.
Conversely, the F/O who doesn't just think he knows everything because he was a fighter pilot, he Knows it!

T/W
Ps. My father in law told me once that he's old enough that he's earned the right to change lanes without signaling or looking
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Old 08-13-2012, 05:57 PM
  #2409  
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Originally Posted by captjns View Post
Damned Jesus freaks who found the way, and won't give it a rest when they're told how happy we are they've found the way, and give a rest... But NOOOOOO they just can't seem to give it a rest. Especially at O-dark 30
Had a Dallas guy get deadheaded to NY once because he was on RSV to fly a 4 day with me when I was in NY. We got 25 minutes into the trip and he said he had to say a prayer to the good lord and savior jesus christ to forgive us for our sins, every time I cursed. Said he knew what the right seat was like, and just wanted me to know. I didnt talk for 4 days, as the other captains in NY had ruined my vocabulary.
If there's no hell, then why all the fuss?

I said "if". Maybe that's it

TW
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Old 08-13-2012, 06:07 PM
  #2410  
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Originally Posted by throttleweenie View Post
What is an air pocket? What's it made out of? What's in it?

TW
1. sort of like a gravity spike
2. not air
3. Lint, oh, and at the bottom, there are idiots.

No, the gravity spike is what you use to pop the air pocket with. Then the lint, which has migrates from your navel, is used as a non-meat filler to create a cozy place for the idiots to nestle in the bottom of the pocket. Hopefully, a zippered or button-down.

TW
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