60av8tor

Wow - I’m starting to see what’s going on... Good luck....

ninerdriver

This. Don't mention the captain. Don't mention the SID/STAR tips. TiredSoul perfectly described how the Q&A should go.

MiLa

Im glad to hear your wife is getting better...As others have said, all that information that you provided and details about your check rides have nothing to do with the advice you’re seeking going forward. All the narrative you provided doesn’t change what advice you receive about a failed check ride. I understand why you mentioned all of it, but at the end of the day by mentioning all of it, it sounds like excuses. Not trying to be an a$$ but just want to give you honest feedback.... As others have said, this isn’t the end of the world for you and in this environment you will be given another chance. However how you handle it will be critical.... The facts are that you were dealing with a family medical issue, you thought you could press on. It was a mistake and you should have delayed and taken care of your family. You’ve learned from your mistakes and such.... As soon as you start mentioning what the captains and instructors did to you, it immediately sounds like excuses even though you say that it was your fault for not catching them.

ZeroTT

What happened leading up to the failure is irrelevant. You need a story to tell going forward and that story has to be 100.000% “_I_ made a mistake. _I_ have learned from it”. No other person can be involved. Use the two sentence story you’ve been given above.

rickair7777

Two things going on here... the OP is taking the bust a bit too personally. Perhaps his "pilot identity" involved never having busted anything, perhaps he was the ace-of-the-base back at the flight school. He needs to get over that right now, it's just the nature of the business. Not everybody gets a trophy in 121. Do some careful self-analysis to make sure you know what really went wrong. No need to discuss or defend that in public, just make sure you know so you can avoid it in the future. The family situation might well be the beginning, middle, and end of that. Or not.

Second thing, need to take the advice here on how to handle it with interviewers. If they detect a defensive/deflecting attitude to go along with a recent 121 bust, you'll be done. The silver lining is that you actually have a good excuse, just don't get blinded by your own propaganda... if there were any other issues, make sure you identify and address them (not saying there are, but don't know either way).

TiredSoul

Dude....stop digging...please!
Life’s not fair but it’s not like you were framed by the cops and put away for murder.
This picking at minutiae is going to do you in, NOT the failed ride.
Get up, dust off, start running again.

FOI- Fundamentals Of Instructing, defense mechanisms, you’re displaying most of them.

In aviation terms, you’re focusing on the burned out light while you’re running out of gas.

filejw

My observation over a 38 years of air carrier flying is people with emotional baggage don’t do so well in any type initial training . Delay if possible is the best choice.

USMCFLYR

It is also a completely one-sided story that anyone with a training background would question solely on the fact that they have probably had many students at some point in time who thought one thing about a training flight and to hear the same tale from the IP there was usually much more to the story.

JohnBurke

Most everyone here is saying the same thing, so pay attention:

When asked about this event, you had some valid challenges going on in your life. You made some mistakes. You were overwhelmed by the emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual stress that you and your wife were under, as would any reasonable person. You gave it your best anyway, which is admirable, but it just wasn't happening.

When you interview next you can explain that you're aware of mistakes you made, that you're past that difficult time, and that you're prepared to move forward

Do not discuss the event in detail. Do not assign blame. You made mistakes, you learned from them. Be prepared to relate what you learned.

DO NOT assign fault in any way to any company, or check airman, or equipment. Those with a lot more experience than you, and a lot more industry insight than you, who have seen this material before, will see nothing but excuses if you try to explain it. They don't want to hear it.

I had some difficulty. I learned. This is what I learned. I am ready to proceed.

No details about the ride, no explanations. 11 pages? No. Not even a paragraph. Not even a sentence.

We've all had family emergencies. You faced a potentially life altering event, both for you and for your wife. You were forced to confront all the stages of grief, consider many possibilities, and probably lived for some time with your stomach tied in knots with worry. Nobody faults you for this, and nobody faults you for not being a perfect performer when you had such a burden in your life.

Don't beat yourself up. Don't beat anyone else up. Relate your family circumstance in as few words and as simply as you can. Own that you found it hard to focus on training with the pressure of a family emergency. You tried, but ultimately were unable to balance the two. You took the time to see the matter through. You're prepared once again to give all your attention to training. Done.

It's that simple. Keep it that way.

MidnightHauler

Honestly, you're getting priceless advice from everyone on here to help you move on. I would seriously go back and read every response and soak it up like a sponge.
Back in 2007, I was invited to class for Airnet to fly cargo in Barons and eventually Learjets. At the time, it was THE place to go to get single-pilot, multi engine, IFR experience. I was happier than a pig in ****.
Problem was, I didn't fly for over a year before I got the invite. I was still in the military and just finished C-130 loadmaster school for that year. That was my "part-time" Guard job, but I wanted a pilot job on the outside. I figured I was good enough to get through training. Nope, not by a longshot. After twelve sessions in the Frasca sim and countless hours studying, I was shown the door (in a nice way). They told me my attitude was great and they thought I was a good fit as a person, but needed to get more IFR time before trying again later. I told them how much I appreciated their guidance and how grateful I was to learn what they taught. Still to this day, I appreciate what I learned there. I knew the washout was on me. I learned all the mistakes I made in training would've killed me within the first week out on the line.
Your situation seems very similar, except you're blaming your failure on the instructors. What you're failing to see is that they put you through a series of tests in conjunction with sim. They were testing your mental capacity, reaction, and stress level. Flying lines in the 121 world is no joke. There's constant pressure, changes, frustration, fatigue, physical work, long hours, you name it. They we're testing things about you that you weren't even aware of.
Bottom line, assess yourself and make the changes. It's not easy, but doable if you're committed.