Originally Posted by ppping

She is already using the kids as pawns. I am trying to spend as much time with them as possible and she is not being easy about it.

Lifestyle is going to be a big change. House, vacations and budget etc. I am pretty sure by perusing divorce everything was going to stay the exact same for her just with me gone.

Originally Posted by boog123

1. Learn the art of radio silence. The lawyers will listen to you and yours complain, whine and set strategy all day long......for 300/hour.....be prepared to spend thousands explaining to your lawyer, who will then try to explain to her lawyer, who will then have to explain to a judge how you are paid. Lawyers make money when people don’t get along. Judges don’t want to have to set a ruling, they want “agreed orders”. “Agreed orders” save everyone money, except the lawyers.

2. Radio silence with the ex also. She most likely won’t ever see your side, or admit to it.

3. Kids see everything, when they are teenagers, they eventually get thru the chaff.

4. Paying “extra” and doing the right thing, doesn’t always pay dividends.....prepare to be disappointed.

5. Ups and downs, can’t unscramble eggs! Do the best you can, be a good dad. That’s the golden ticket....

Originally Posted by Howgozit

Remember that you are not divorced and you have the same legal rights to your kids as she does. If she prevents you from seeing them tell her you'll be there with a sheriff's deputy to pick up the kids. That changes the attitude going forward. Be polite, but know your rights. Aslo, as many mentioned before, don't fight over little things, make her feel like she is winning, but try to avoid a trial. Mediate if you can, that's a huge win.

Originally Posted by nonononononono

Most women just want their bills paid. The few good women that are out there are too much of a pain to find. Radio silence forever...avoid women like the plague

Originally Posted by ppping

Radio silence and not fighting over the little things are harder than they sound! I am following the advice but about a million things are bothering me. That’s what my buddies and a lawyer are for. If she keeps playing games with the kids I’ll play hardball with a lawyer, temporary order, and a sheriff if needed. I am hoping she lightens up to mediation. It makes sense and I am not making any demands out of the ordinary.

Originally Posted by crewdawg

To add to M31s post above. Don't get married again and ensure you live in a place that doesn't recognize common law marriage.