I nominate the <<Brand X Regional>> FO who rode the jumpseat on my long flight to <<Hub>> the other day. If you were trying to impress us by dropping names of people you know at <<This Airline>>, telling tales of flight instructing ROTC cadets and serving as a crewmember aboard some high ranking guy’s transport aircraft, showing us your whiz bang new tablet (very similar to the ones we’ve been using) and using your vast aviation knowledge to help “diagnose” a system abnormality on our aircraft - which you have zero time in - well, you didn’t. All of that, though, was mildly and humorously tolerable. But when our aforementioned aircraft system abnormality progressed to the point where I needed to pull the QRH and read through and execute a procedure, continuing your incessant babbling crossed into the annoying regime. Dude, when I’m reading step three of a QRH checklist and verifying it with the other crewmember, I really don’t care what the hell your tablet is capable of doing and how cool it is to have your systems study guide and courseware on it. Catch a clue. Oh, by the way, I wasn’t the only one in the cockpit who thought that most of your comments and drivel smacked of “Man, I’m really cool! I can’t believe I haven’t been hired at <<This Airline>>.” If your aim really is to get on with <<This Airline>> or <<That Airline>>, you might want to rethink your approach and presence in the cockpit - and in general.

Roses FTW...

Had a pax poke his head into the cockpit during deplaning belligerently demanding to know why we took off with a tailwind.

" Because it was safe and because it was legal. If you have a couple of minutes I can go over the performance calculations with you."

Offer declined.

I would be surprised if until this day he does not tell the story to his adoring friends of the time he called out the stupid professionals for being professional.

Had a similar experience flying into someplace in the northeast on Christmas eve a few years ago. The weather was reported as just above cat 1 mins with snow so we shoot the approach. Get to DH and no lights, no runway, still in the soup. Go missed. Airliner behind us does the same. We get a box vector and get set up for the cat 2 and try again. The second attempt is uneventful (except that the weather was closer to cat 2 mins than cat 1) and we taxi to the gate. I'm standing in the jet way looking at the paperwork for the flight back while passengers collect their gate check bags. One middle-aged man approaches me and angrily demands to know the reason for the missed approach. I explain the above in layman's terms to which he replies (still fuming) that he could have landed in this and that we were a couple of chicken schnitz (his exact words). I calmly reminded him that the fact he was in the jetway at his destination more or less on time suggested that we had indeed landed to which he responds with another muttered "chicken schnitz". Attempting to difuse the situation, I then say "Sir, you sound like you must be a pilot so surely you..." Before I can finish my sentence he proudly presents his private pilot certificate with an instrument rating. Dumbfounded, all I could reply with was "well...you guys are the most dangerous pilots in aviation. I hope you have a safe drive home."

Well Done!

Rest assured your life is probably a lot better than his if he has to have such negativity (and both of ours are better than a few commenters' here miserable existence!) :p

Don't be angry. People are nervous. They are trying to be funny. Just on Monday somebody asked me before operation "so how many beers did you have last night?"

I always smile and say something like "I'm not sure, I lost count after 14" or something like "oh no you can still smell it on me?" or "not as many as I had this morning", before reassuring them that I had no beers at all.

Just help the pax relax and let it roll off of ya.

Great.

LOL. Public policy has little to do with flying a plane, big guy. TSA's FFDO policy is not made by pilots.

Some people are spring-loaded toward hostility. I remember probably around 25 years ago before iphones and ipads, I saw the United captain of my flight out front when we were both waiting for rides. I called out to him "thanks for 9" and he looked like he was going to punch me in the face. I said "uh um sorry thank you for activating channel 9, I know you don't have to and some of us really enjoy listening" and he totally relaxed and said "oh you're welcome." I always wonder what he thought I meant.

I once had this happen to me flying out of or into Canada. Some lady sitting next to me said ...jeez this is such a small airplane (CRJ700 ) and I replied yes ma'am it is, but I don't see United flying a 747 into this airport to pick up 60 people a day🙃
Oh and btw this is the largest airplane your country makes...
Her face was one of shock...then she said no we make boeings and stuff...
I told her no Americans build those in Washington...
We didn't talk rest of the flight .

Pretty sure ALPA had a hand and say in crafting the policy through working groups and PACs. I think you might could find a pilot or two in that organization. Just like the AMA does when the public policy being crafted concerns the medical profession.

So you assumed she was Canadian? Why? Did she have beady eyes and a flapping head?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTuQOmgl_Z4