Tool of the day
06-19-2012, 05:18 PM
#1681
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Dec 2007
Position: ATL717A
Posts: 890
Originally Posted by wiggy
...there was nothing...a cold, steely, almost malignant, completely humorless stare. They say the eyes are the "windows of the soul" ...when I looked into this guy's eyes, it's as if two "off" flags dropped into view, indicating an insidious failure somewhere in the underlying machinery....
I love this line. I will commit this to memory and use it sometime soon.
06-20-2012, 07:38 AM
#1683
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Oct 2010
Position: Decoupled
Posts: 922
Originally Posted by wiggy
Years ago when based at DFW as a 727 F/O flew with a character whose reputation preceeded him by a "significant" amount. I was told people had been bidding to avoid flying with this guy for years. Of course, I thought I was a pretty easygoing guy and could tolerate just about anybody....When I ended up flying with him, I could tell at first he was a little "ideosyncratic"....
"Not very good, -high by 200 feet on that altitude restriction!" -he blurted out in a rather unfriendly, louder than necessary voice (I was trying to meet altitude restrictions at a certain DME on a long descent...done all manually with 3 to 1 "Kentucky windage" on the 727) Then when he grew a little more "comfortable" with me, I suppose...his true colors started to show.... On one leg I left climb power on for a brief time after level off and as the airplane accelerated to about .85 he screamed out at the top of his lungs "THE WINGS AND THE TAIL FALL OFF AT .88 OR .89!" -after which I looked over at him in shock and said "huh?" (his screaming distracted me) he screamed again "THE WINGS AND THE TAIL....etc" -that was his "subtle" way of saying "watch your power setting, we're accelerating through cruise mach".
This guy carried his own bag of "gruel" with him on trips....wouldn't eat food off the airplane...he only asked for hot water from the flight attendants to mix with his gruel. He was a "survivalist" type, talked about guns and food storage etc. He hated having flight attendants in the cockpit, even on long enroute legs. (the days when f/a's were young and beautiful and flirty) This guy was not just a weird pilot, but a strange human being. He got along great with the S/O, who was a retired Air Force Major about 45-50 yrs old and Mormon, so he had the whole food storage/end-of-days thing as a common interest. They talked about military retirements, then he (the capt.) asked me if I was retired military (I was about 30 yrs old at the time) ...I looked over at him trying to find just the slightest little "glint" of "kidding" or "humor" in his eyes....there was nothing...a cold, steely, almost malignant, completely humorless stare. They say the eyes are the "windows of the soul" ...when I looked into this guy's eyes, it's as if two "off" flags dropped into view, indicating an insidious failure somewhere in the underlying machinery. Strange dude, -to say the least....
"Not very good, -high by 200 feet on that altitude restriction!" -he blurted out in a rather unfriendly, louder than necessary voice (I was trying to meet altitude restrictions at a certain DME on a long descent...done all manually with 3 to 1 "Kentucky windage" on the 727) Then when he grew a little more "comfortable" with me, I suppose...his true colors started to show.... On one leg I left climb power on for a brief time after level off and as the airplane accelerated to about .85 he screamed out at the top of his lungs "THE WINGS AND THE TAIL FALL OFF AT .88 OR .89!" -after which I looked over at him in shock and said "huh?" (his screaming distracted me) he screamed again "THE WINGS AND THE TAIL....etc" -that was his "subtle" way of saying "watch your power setting, we're accelerating through cruise mach".
This guy carried his own bag of "gruel" with him on trips....wouldn't eat food off the airplane...he only asked for hot water from the flight attendants to mix with his gruel. He was a "survivalist" type, talked about guns and food storage etc. He hated having flight attendants in the cockpit, even on long enroute legs. (the days when f/a's were young and beautiful and flirty) This guy was not just a weird pilot, but a strange human being. He got along great with the S/O, who was a retired Air Force Major about 45-50 yrs old and Mormon, so he had the whole food storage/end-of-days thing as a common interest. They talked about military retirements, then he (the capt.) asked me if I was retired military (I was about 30 yrs old at the time) ...I looked over at him trying to find just the slightest little "glint" of "kidding" or "humor" in his eyes....there was nothing...a cold, steely, almost malignant, completely humorless stare. They say the eyes are the "windows of the soul" ...when I looked into this guy's eyes, it's as if two "off" flags dropped into view, indicating an insidious failure somewhere in the underlying machinery. Strange dude, -to say the least....
I don't know what it was about DFW, but back in the day it seemed to attract a large number of these types. I had one that was plotting to kill his wife. I loaned him a dollar to pay for the van because he didn't have change. A week or so after the trip, he was killed in a private aviation accident. If people hadn't reported seeing him in the casket, I would have belived that he faked his death to stalk his exwife and then go to ground. But, people did see him in the casket. A week later I go into work and in my mailbox is a dollar with a note from him saying thanks. That felt a little weird.
06-20-2012, 10:07 AM
#1684
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Feb 2008
Position: DFW 737 Captain
Posts: 191
Originally Posted by orvil
I don't know what it was about DFW, but back in the day it seemed to attract a large number of these types. I had one that was plotting to kill his wife. I loaned him a dollar to pay for the van because he didn't have change. A week or so after the trip, he was killed in a private aviation accident. If people hadn't reported seeing him in the casket, I would have belived that he faked his death to stalk his exwife and then go to ground. But, people did see him in the casket. A week later I go into work and in my mailbox is a dollar with a note from him saying thanks. That felt a little weird.
...wow, creepy...
06-20-2012, 04:54 PM
#1689
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Jun 2009
Posts: 786
Originally Posted by wiggy
Years ago when based at DFW as a 727 F/O...
If we’re delving deep into the past recesses of our career, “the early days” were ripe…fertile ground for tool of the day stories. Prior to the advent of CRM and fewer concepts of accountability for behavior in the cockpit? Think Wild West.
So here’s my first of two TOTD self-nomination stories: A long, long time ago I was flying for one of several commuters that all got lumped together to feed a major’s hub. This was a ground breaking, unique concept at the time. Previously, regionals truly stuck to a region that was more or less synonymous with their name, (i.e. Air Midwest flew primarily to cities in…you guessed it, the Midwest) In any event I end up paired with a Captain that was several years junior to me, who was hired off the street as a captain because he had a type on the airplane. Due to the recent consolidation, I was commuting to my new temporary base. This was also before the invention of roller bags, so I carried a small hard sided suitcase about twice the size of a briefcase, that just barely had room for 4 days worth of stuff. And two binders of jeps in a small brainbag.
I walked into ops and sat down about two hours ahead of departure. My captain comes in, so I approached him to ask if he was Mckowan or Mckewan. Apparently I mispronounced his name. He said, “No.”, OK, whatever. I sat back down and waited. An hour prior to departure, I headed out to the ramp and preflighted. Threw my little hard shell suitcase in the nose locker. It was a nice cool sunny day, so I climbed in and sat down to read a little. In a few minutes, here comes Captain McWhatever. As he approaches the airplane he sets his flightbag and headset down ramp side and without bothering to stick his head in and ask if I'd already done it, proceeds to duplicate my exterior preflight. When he gets to the nose, even though I can’t see him over the glare shield, I see the battery bus powered annunciator light illuminate when he opens the locker where my little bag is stowed. The light goes off and a few moments latter he climbs up the stairs and introduces himself to me like we hadn’t seen each other in ops.
Next he asks me, “Do you know who’s bag that is in the nose locker?” (Mind you only crew, never rampers were allowed to use the nose locker. My bag always had a crew tag with my name on it, which I am sure he saw.)
Me, “Yes sir it’s mine.”
Him, “Well take it back inside and leave it in ops.”
Me, "Why?"
Him, "Because we're going to a high altitude airport and we might need the weight for performance."
Me, “Wait, this is a 4 day trip, my first week at this base... I don’t know where or even if it’s safe to leave it here and besides if we break down somewhere, I want my suitcase with me.”
Him, “Well if we need the weight, your bag is going to be staying at the outstation.”
Me, “If my bag stays, I stay. As far as I am concerned it’s part of the OEW.”
Him, “We’ll see about that.”
Me, “I guess we will.”
In an extreme situation, there was room in the cockpit for our little suitcases so long as you packed minimally. As far as everyone but this guy was concerned, that prevented it from needing to be counted on the manifest.
So the first six legs went about as well as can be expected, especially given how we'd gotten started. Fortunately push never came to shove on the bag issue and the day passed with minimal communication, no personal conversation, no bonding and wow, what could have been fun, was a long day, nearing it's end. On the last taxi out of the hub for the evening flight to the layover, we get closed, started and half way to the runway, when Captain MacGyver awakens the voice activated intercom for the first non-proceedural communiqué of the day, as he simultaneously bangs his hand on the glare shield, “Dang-it!!!!”
Me, “What?”
Him, “I forgot my overnight bag in Ops!”
Me holding back tears and laughter, “I might have an extra douche nozzle you can borrow.”
Macgyver theme song - YouTube And yes the number one engine is feathered at :29
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